We all can use a friend in a time of need, don’t we? Sometimes, we tend to think that everyone that we get along with or spend great time with are friends. A friend can be as old as your mother or father or live outside your time zone. While it is nicer to have a friend nearby, within your age bracket and pay grade, your view of friendship should not be blurred by needless sentiments.
Good friends are hard to find. They may not always give you money but they can give their time, advice and resources. They always think of you even when you are nowhere close. When you are offline for too long, a true friend is always that one person who checks up on you.
What then are those bad behaviours that can ruin friendships? Here are six of them.
- Jealousy
This is one of the major reasons why friendships often come to an end. One friend may secure a better job, get married or relocate to a favourable place. You may intentionally turn down invitations by your friend just because you cannot stand how much her new found wealth reminds you of your state of poverty. Watch it. You are becoming jealous. When you feel jealous of your friend, open up to your friend about it. Honesty about your feelings can be helpful.
- Lying
Are you fond of lying about your achievements or financial worth to your friend? Or are you being unnecessarily secretive about something that is obvious to your mutual friends or associates? Your friend is going to find out and will be hurt.
- Asking for Favours
Do you wait until you are in need to reach out to a friend? You must know that everyone has needs too and when you define a friend as someone you can get things from, you are not a friend- you are a user. Always seek ways to return a favour done by a friend, even when they least expect it.
- Competitive Spirit
Some friends always want to buy the same kind of car, house, clothes that you have or even more expensive ones. Unless you both agree to “twin up” on buying stuff, any friend who is racing to have everything that you have is toxic.
- Bringing Guests To Your Home
When your friend brings another guest to your home without asking you first, the friend is being disrespectful. It is always good for your friend to check with you before inviting people to your home. Remember, it is your house, your rules.
- A Need for Control
As a friend, you must respect your friend’s preferences. Do not try to impose a choice of dressing, diet, supplements, job or future partner on them. Stop sending your friend on errands when he or she visits you. Rather, let your friend volunteer to help.
- Lack of Appreciation
How often do you remember to say thank you to your friend? You must thank your friend for checking up on you, giving you a gift- no matter how cheap- and making personal sacrifices for you.
- Being Close to Your Rivals
A friend that tends to maintain ties with people who are not your friends or who dislike you can be very dangerous. Trust issues will arise. Also, you won’t know whose side your friend is on when your back is turned.
- Being Always Right
A friend who is always right never accepts that he or she is wrong. A friend who is so opinionated will never see things differently from the way they have always seen the world even in the present of facts. These friends will spoil your things and still blame you for it.
- Lack of communication
When you fail to communicate your feelings and fears with your friend, it can result in deep animosity or a misunderstanding. Silence is not golden when there are issues that should be ironed out to strengthen the bond of friendship.